The Official Title Of ‘Star Wars: Episode VII’ Has Been Announced And It’s NOT This…


Thanks to the magic of the Star Wars twitter (which is, as you know, manned by over-caffeinated Ewoks 24/7), we now know that Star Wars: Episode VII will not carry the bodacious subtitle, “Lando & the Fett Rising”, but will instead be called: The Force Awakens.

We also know now for certain that principal photography has wrapped up, which means that the only thing thats left for JJ Abrams to do is alien cheesecake photography and lens flare add-ins.

Fans of Radio Bastard know that this is our second straight #TitleFail following DC’s shortsighted rejection of the title, Batman & Superman: Friendship is Magic.

Jason Tabriz, Radio Bastard’s Vice President of Bullshit Movie Titles and Obscure References, had this to say about today’s news:

“This feels like missed opportunity for the Star movie people, but we shall persevere. We still hope that a Lando/Boba Fett adventure will make it to big screens someday, but for now, we’re focusing on our effort to get the A-Team/Golden Girls reimagining into production with a new director now that Paul Feig is otherwise engaged.

We’ve also put in a bid in to do the title work on Star Wars: Episode VIII. So far, the boys downstairs have come up with “Star Wars and the Surprising Affinity for Jar Jar“. It’s a work-in-progress.

So from our viewpoint, the future’s so bright, we have to wear shades,”

Tabrus closed off his remarks by shouting, “Peace! Love! And Soul!” and then he did some kind of spin move before walking away without explanation.

Anyway, here’s the official Star Wars: The Force Awakens logo.

LenoSource: Ewok-run Twitter account