Star Wars Fans: Kraft Mac And Cheese Knows About Your ‘Room Of Lies’

On a recent episode of SNL, a TV show that Jason tells me is not dissimilar from Saturday Night Live, a NBC sketch comedy show that ceased to exist when I stopped watching it in 2010, featured a parody commercial giving the gears to nerds everywhere with the old ‘toys in the packages’ stereotype. You can see that clip below. And might I add ‘hardee har har’ that’s some good satire.

Now, the in the above commercial (yes, I know I am expecting you to use an insanely bizarre reading for this.. just go with it, ok? It’s too late to turn back now) well if for some strange reason you haven’t already watched that ad above, please do so now. Ouch, right? Kraft is using their cheese and noodles against us.

I’m not trying to launch into some in-the-package/out-of-the-package debate here (personally, I let my toys breath,) I will, however, raise a small moment of contention as to the public perception that anyone who buys toys is some sort of man-child obsessive collector, huddled away in a basement, fawning away over piles of unopened boxes of Micronauts and Stretch Armstrongs and Visionairies – in the dark of course, so that the UV light doesn’t fade the boxes. Our skin pale and dusty, eyes bleary and wet as we lust to protect ‘preciouses.’

I’ll have you know that all my action figures escape their plastic and cardboard cages the moment they land in my hands, enjoy a brief moment of ‘posing’ which is very different playing with them, might I add, before they are put into a basement (devoid of natural light, of course, that UV light is killer on the plastic) so that I can lust and fawn over them.

We need to change this stigma. We need to redefine the public perception of  the hobby. From this day forth, we should cast off the shackles of that stingy and repressed obsessive ‘collector’ the media portrays us as. The odd, social outcast with these seemingly pedantic and deviant behaviors…

We should refer to ourselves as ‘adult toy enthusiasts!’ That should help clear some of this up.